Out of control
by Fleur06
Summary: How far will Kerry go to get back at the people who kill the person that means the most to her, how far will she take her revenge. Will she push away the people trying to help her, will they be able to help her in time and save her from herself.
1. Chapter 1

Another long night shift, how Lawson hated these, a double shift as well, why was TR needed at night, it is alright for Kerry to say, they want tactical response out there to deal with the situations that arise and for her to go home at some reasonable hour, into the com "Leon anything, we need something here Leon, there has to be something somewhere?"

Taken out of his thoughts and tossing food up into his mouth, he couldn't do that whilst Kerry was there, a thing about food on the floor, as if he missed, looking at the screen, "nothing Lawson, a boring slow night",

Turing to look at Stella after Leon's response "that would be right, Kerry wants us out on the quietest night", seeing Stella looking at him "can't we just go back to base, let Josh stay out there, I haven't slept in 48 hours", raising his eyes at Stella "old age catching up with you then Stel", getting a glare from her, with Christian laughing in the back.

Seeing a box flash up on his screen "Lawson, your wanted at the Cnr of Bourke Street and Queen Street, they want Tactical Response down there"

Nodding finally something to do "details Leon?", watching the screen slightly confused before replying "A drug overdose, homicide"

Looking at Stella, confused "why would tactical response be needed for a drug overdose?", seeing Stella raise her eyes at him, waiting for a response from Leon "No idea, but they want someone from TR down there"

Lawson into his com "we're on our way"

Pulling up a short time later, Lawson walks over, seeing a blanket over the person he looks around, before taking it off, he finds the person in charge "Senior Sergeant Lawson Blake from Tactical Response?" nodding at Lawson, " Detective Lucy Gallagher from Drug Squad, Detective Peter George from Homicide" then pointing further away "Detective Chris Finch", looking at them wondering why they were called down there "why do you need Tactical Response here?"

Walking away with Lawson towards the body "Superintendent Kerry Vincent, is still in Tactical Response?", nodding Lawson's face turns to shock, surely the body isn't Kerry, since when did Kerry do drugs she has been so against it even more since James's situation, no it can't be, looking back at them trying to keep his voice neutral "Yes, she has the night off, what's this about?", walking towards the body "the id on the body is James Vincent, a suspected drug overdose", walking towards the body, Lawson looks at them "Does Kerry know?" seeing them shake their heads "not yet", seeing Chris walk over to them, "Lawson", then turning to Lucy and Lawson "I'll go and see Kerry now?"

Looking around it is all surreal, James dead, Lawson didn't know him that well, as far as he was aware he had been in rehab and off drugs for months now, looking around "are you sure it is a drug overdose, no doubt your aware he was testifying soon", seeing Chris nod "We still need an autopsy, but nothing is being ruled out just yet."

Seeing Lawson turns to look at her, his voice seems like a millions miles away not next to her, she didn't know James, not at all, she hadn't really met him, heard about him, and looking for him when Kerry got the whole squad involved, seeing her reaction the, she feels for her already. Looking up at Lawson she follows him to the car.

…..

Knocking on Kerry's door, it is early morning, maybe he should of rung first instead of turning up on her doorstep, no she would of worried the whole time it took them to get there.

Hearing an insistent banging on the door, Kerry throws on some clothes, looking at the clock it is 4.30 am, bloody James, leaving his keys behind, he deserves to stay outside.

Hearing the banging getting louder and louder and more urgent, she walks down stairs calling out "Hang on James, I should leave you out for not having a key", opening the door she sees Lawson there, her body tensing up, why is he here, what has happened, the look on his face, no smile or larrikin look, a sombre look, looking beyond him, he sees TR1 there. "What's happened Lawson",

Seeing Kerry standing at the door, opening it up the shock on her face seeing him there, instantly knowing something, was wrong, following her inside, he walks over to the lounge, sitting down, seeing her standing up, he walks over to her, not wanting to say anything, reaching out to touch her arm "Your scaring me here Lawson tell me what's going on" the air of confidence gone from her voice, a slightly scared to it "I'm sorry, we were called out tonight, James has died Kerry", seeing Kerry shake her head "No your wrong, James was only here a few hours ago, he'll be back soon", reaching out with both hands on her arms "Kerry listen to me, we were there, in the city, they need you to identify the body", shaking out of Lawson's grasp "So they don't know for sure it is James then, its all a mistake"

Biting his lips, watching Kerry's face how he wished it was all a mistake, it was someone else, but no it was James "I'll take you there?"

Walking back up the stairs to get dressed, Lawson's wrong, James isn't dead, he was out with friends in the city, he will walk through the door any moment now.

Walking back down the stairs she follows Lawson to her car, driving into the city he sees Kerry looking straight ahead, trying to be strong, "the Id on the body belonged to James", not even looking at Lawson "someone could of stolen it Lawson doesn't prove it is James" As, they pull up at Bourke Street, getting out of the car she follows Lawson, walking the rope she stop turning to Lawson ":why is drug squad here?", taking a deep breath "It is a suspected drug overdose" looking slightly more confident "then its not James, he went to rehab, he isn't into drugs anymore". Walking closer to the body, seeing the blanket over it, one of the feet hanging out, her eyes open, the shoes are like the ones that James wear, glued to the spot she can't walk any further, no it can't be James, slowly her confidence fading away.

Not seeing Chris Finch walk up to them, until Kerry hears his voice "When your ready Kerry, we'll need you to identify the body

Not even looking at Chris "You've got the wrong person, it isn't James", not even seeing Chris exchange a look with Lawson.

Seeing Kerry stop and look at the body, he feels her tense up, her face showing shock and staring ahead, putting his hand on her arm, he hears her whisper "James has shoes like that."

Seeing the realisation that it could be James hit her, her face starting to show shock, her hope slowly fading away "Kerry, do you want me to pull back the blanket for you?"

Nodding but unable to speak she watches as Lawson reaches down before calling out loudly "No stop I can't do it, it can't be James", taking a deep breath, closely her eyes, she turns to Lawson no words just nodding, seeing Lawson pull the blanket slowly back, the first glimpse of hair she sees is James colour, her breathing coming rapidly as she watches the blanket get pulled further down the familiar hair, then the face, relaxed peaceful face, she would know that face anywhere, even though it had been years between seeing him until recently, yes that is her boy her voice quick "Pull the blanket up" wiping away the tears in her eyes not even looking at Chris nodding not saying anything, she hears Chris's voice "I'm sorry Kerry but we need you to say it", her voice soft and weak "that's James" before walking away.

Feeling Lawson's arms upon her she collapses, her body wracked with sobs, a million thoughts going through her mind,, how did it happen, James had been off drugs for ages now, she was sure of it, had she been so caught up with her work and everything that she had missed the signs. Pulling herself together quickly, she walks away, she can't be there not wanting to show weakness or vunerability in front of the others

Pulling up at Kerry's place, Lawson watches as Kerry gets out of the car, not saying anything to him, walking up to the front door, her hands fumbling with the keys, slowly opening the door she walks past James' room, looking in, so messy, his clothes over the floor, walking inside his room, his things everywhere, picking some of them up, throwing them across the room, ignoring the tears that are wanting to fall, walking out to the kitchen, getting a bottle of wine and glass, she doesn't even realise that Lawson is in the room, pouring herself a glass, as he hears her voice "You really think you should be drinking Kerry?", not even looking at him "what are you still doing here?" walking over to her and trying to look her in the eye "someone needs to be here with you", sitting down on the chair with her wine "Who says Lawson, you….I'm fine so go running back to Shannon and leave me alone",

Taking a deep breath, she is so infuriating at times, now one of them, always so tough and strong, not letting people in to her, her, coping on her own "you don't need to go through this by yourself Kerry or do this to yourself", Looking or more glaring at Lawson "Do what to myself, what are you a psychologist?"

Taking a deep breath "I'm here to help you Kerry, let people help you, don't deal or go through this by yourself, let people in, stop trying to be strong?" seeing Kerry's blue eyes pierce through him "You got kids Lawson?" not letting him continue knowing the answer her voice angrier and higher "No, so when you do come back and then tell me how I should be coping or feeling, you have no idea, so just get out", walking closer to her "It doesn't mean that we can't help you so let people in"

Looking up at Lawson,, trying to control her emotion "You want to help then get back to work and find out who was responsible for this?"

Looking at Kerry with concern "It was a drug overdose Kerry?", her eyes fixed with a glare on Lawson "No someone made him take it, I know my son, so find out what happened?". Looking into Kerry's eyes "maybe you think you know him"

Watching as Kerry gets up of the lounge walking over to him, her eyes level with his, and face close to his, her eyes filled with anger "If you want to stay in Tactical Response Lawson, do what I say." moving towards the door "Just take it easy Kerry…I am sorry, call you if you need me for anything", looking at Lawson the care and concern in his eyes evident "I wont" then softly "Thanks"

Waiting a short period of time, Kerry opens the door walking to her car, not even looking around she hears a voice closing her eyes "damm she thought Lawson had gone. "where are you going, I don't think you should be driving" Not even looking at Lawson "Lawson it doesn't matter what you think, I'm going" seeing TR pull up "where?", hopping in her car, as she reverses down the driveway "I'm paying drug squad a visit, I'm going to find out what happened"

Watching as she drives away, he sees Stella looking at him "are we following her?" shaking his head "No", hoping against hope that she won't do anything she will regret,


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Pulling out of the driveway, onto the road, not even looking at where she is going, having to keep busy, she can't let her mind wander to the previous night was it only a few hours ago that she said goodbye to James, was it not that long ago that she was asking him to tidy up around the place, his things everywhere, not long back from rehab, he can't be dead. Not hearing the beeping of the cars around her.

Pulling up at drug squad a short time later, she squeals to halt, getting out of the car in a hurry, not even making sure the car is closed properly. Walking inside, she ignores the lady on the desk, as she calls out to her "excuse me you can't go in there", turning around her eyes full of anger blazing "try to stop me", pushing past her the receptionist "I'm calling security", flashing her badge at her 'I'm from Tactical Response"

Running up the stairs the lift too slow, it isn't long before she arrives on the 3rd Floor, looking around she sees him walking towards her, his eyes full of sympathy, as she says her name "Kerry, what are you doing here", the venom in her voice, the anger her voice loud nearly yelling pointing at him "You said you would look after him, your promised you would keep him safe, you said if he testified you would keep him safe, that is bullshit Chris" pointing her finger close to him "You, You killed him and let him die"

Looking around the office, Detective Chris Finch sees people coming out of the cubicle seeing what was happening, putting his hand of her arm, she flings it off, trying to move her away from where she is, away from the prying eyes of everyone.

Glancing out of his eyes, he sees Detective Gallagher walk up, over hearing the conversation "I'm sorry Kerry, the autopsy report has come back, James did die from a drug overdose, no one killed him, he was just unlucky this time"

Turning around her blue eyes flashing in anger, her voice loud "James did not take drugs anymore, he was out of that, no matter what the autopsy report says, someone killed my son, you did not know my son" before turning back to face Chris

Her voice soft, the detective looking at Kerry "Maybe you just hoped he was?", spinning around quickly to face her again, moving her face close to hers her voice full of anger "You did not know my son, I knew my son, he was not a drug addict anymore" then facing Chris again her voice loud "He was killed because you did not do your job, YOU did not look after him, you got him to testify against them, and that was it, you got what you wanted"

Looking at Kerry seeing the anger and blame towards him "WE all knew the risks Kerry, including you, we weren't the only ones that were looking after him, you knew the dangers you're his mother Kerry as well as a cop, no one got what they wanted here"

Looking at Chris in disbelief, her anger towards him getting out of control, struggling to keep any control of the situation yelling at Chris walking close to him, her face close to his "You got him killed, so don't try to blame anyone else, if you didn't get him to testify then he would still be here today, he was killed by someone and I will find out who, I never should of trusted you."

….

Answering the phone back at base, Leon quickly hangs up before speaking into the coms "Lawson, your needed at drug squad now?"

Looking at Stella in the car before speaking into his coms "did they say what it was about?"

Imitating the lady on the phone "Please send Senior Sergeant Lawson Blake, not that pompous other Senior Sergeant who thinks he is so great" hearing the laughter coming through the coms, Leon is serious again "they just said it was urgent Lawson, and to just bring you and TR, no one else"

Into his com, whilst looking at Stella "Ok, on our way we will be there in a few minutes"

Pulling up at Drug Squad a few minutes later, Lawson sees Kerry's car on the street, the windows down, mumbling to himself "I have a bad feeling about this", seeing Stella looking at him "Isn't that Kerry's car" nodding as they hurry inside, Lawson walks up to the receptionist, showing his badge "Senior Sergeant Blake from Tactical Response", nodding to the two officers "come this way"

Following her up, Lawson turned to her "Were you the one who called it in" she shakes her head, "not that you couldn't her the screaming from down here", arriving on the 3rd floor, Lawson sees someone walking over to them "Rachel, come this way" nodding Lawson looks around before speaking "you called it in?", seeing Rachel nod, "she was getting out of hand, screaming yelling, she has calmed down slightly, but I thought she was about to start to hit Detective Chris Finch"

Not really needing to ask who she is, Lawson has a pretty good guess "she as in Superintendent Vincent?", glancing at Stella and Christian, their mouths slightly open, Lawson sees Rachel nod "I know she has just lost her son, but you should of seen her?"

Looking at Rachel "We'll take it from here, where is she now" turning to Stella and Christian "stay here"

Walking towards the room, Lawson can still hear Kerry's voice, as he carefully opens the door, seeing Kerry there glaring at Chris her voice still loud.

Turning around, Kerry sees Lawson standing at the door, her glare also directed at him "shit Lawson, what are you doing here?", seeing him look at Chris "Do you mind Chris, have you finished".

Looking at Kerry before back at Lawson "I am, not sure about Kerry though" then walking closer to Lawson "What are you doing here?", whispering to Chris, before he leaves the room

Seeing Lawson look at her, the look he has given her before, the what are you doing, not wanting his help or anything from him "what are you doing here?", seeing his concerned face "I could ask you the same thing Kerry, really think coming here and yelling at Chris, will do something?", rolling her eyes at him "Yes….. they didn't do their job Lawson, why am I even telling you this", "and yelling at them, helped did it"

Rolling her eyes again at him "are you finished? matter of fact yes and I will find out who did this and when I do they will pay, just shut up Lawson, just get out of here" before storming out of the office.

Following Kerry out, Lawson smiles at Chris apologetically "sorry" seeing Chris walk towards him, turning to glare at Rachel "sorry Lawson, Tactical Response shouldn't of been called, just keep an eye on her. Kerry always like this?" Giving a short laugh at Chris, Lawson nods "Pretty much, she's not too bad most of the time", looking around before Chris continues "For your information, I'm not sure it was a drug overdose either" looking at Chris "did you tell Kerry that?" giving a short laugh "No, but she wouldn't let me say much, the case isn't closed, I will keep following it."

…

Walking out of drug squad, Lawson sees Kerry sitting in her car, her head on the steering wheel before looking up staring straight ahead, turning to the other two "give me a minute", knocking on the passenger door, before opening it he sees her looking at him, her eyes filled with tears threatening to poor out, before she turns her face around, he is well aware she hates people seeing her like that, crying, the only time he had seen her cry was when Grace died, and then she hated that anyone had seen her.

Hopping in the car slightly he looks at her, his face full of concern "You going to be ok", seeing her nod but saying nothing.

"Kerry you need to see a counsellor, talk to someone, going into drug squad yelling at them….." not letting him finished "Lawson just piss off", shaking his head "I'm not going anywhere Kerry", looking at him, talking through gritted teeth "I'm fine". Seeing her hands shaking on the steering wheel, he leans over reaching for the keys, talking gently and softly "No, you not, let me drive you, back to your place, Stel, can pick me up"

Not even looking at him, as she feels her eyes fill up with tears, she knows she is in no state to drive "I'm going to base", raising his eyes in surprise "Sure that is a good idea"

Seeing her take a deep breath, before talking through gritted teeth "I'm fine Lawson, I'm going to base" then softly adding "I just can't sit at home doing nothing", feeling his touch on her arm, she opens the door getting out nodding "Just drive me to base"

Pulling up at base, Lawson watches Kerry get out of the car, not even looking at him, not a glance a word or anything, before striding down the hallway towards the communications room.

Hearing footsteps enter the communications room, Leon turns around his eyes open in surprise, he didn't expect to see Kerry back at work for a few days quickly glancing at his desk "what are you doing here?"

Rolling her eyes at Leon "I work here Leon" then moving towards him "didn't think I'd come in, did you" seeing his cheezel tower, her anger boiling over as she brings her hand down smashing it then pointing to the screen her voice louder "that is what your meant to do, not look up porn, internet dating sites, look at the screen, help the guys out, none of your stupid crap." Backing away from Kerry, she is scary when she gets into her yelling bad mood, seeing her look at him as she is about to walk out "Just get rid of the mess Leon"

Seeing Kerry walking towards him a short time later, Leon looks at her cautiously, as much as he likes Kerry and thinks she is a pretty good boss, when she is mad/angry, he is the first to admit he is scared of her, the look on her face is enough to make him back away, it isn't often now, that she is like that but the few times she is, mostly caused by Lawson pissing her off too, even he knows to leave her alone.

Seeing Leon look at her, not the normal look on his face, not in the mood to really care, "Find out who made the triple 0 call last night, the phone box it came from the phone number what ever you can." looking at Kerry, he wonders if it is wise "Is this about James?", not even looking at him "Just do it Leon, your not paid to question what I ask you?", ignoring her outburst "I need to know what I'm looking for Kerry?" then quieter "I'm not paid enough anyway, not working with you in your moods", raising her eyes slightly at him "What….You've worked here long enough Leon, to be able to figure that one out", looking at Kerry "is this the new Kerry, I'm working with now, the one with attitude, bossy, not nice to work around….. I do want the other Kerry back", seeing her eyes open wider, "Pardon?" looking at Kerry, he had said more than enough, not able to get out of what he said "I know you've just lost James, but taking it out of me, Kerry, it isn't fair, I'm doing my job here" leaning down towards him, he leans back slightly "Is that what you call it. You better get used to it then Leon, and start doing your job correctly instead of slacking off." Going to walk away "this has nothing to do with James, let me know when you've found something"

Calling out to Kerry a while later, Leon sees her walking towards him, her face looking tired, her eyes tinged with sadness, "There is no record of any call being made to 000", seeing Kerry looking at him, her face thinking "That can't be right, are you sure?", nodding then turning to look at her "There was no phone call to 000 for am ambulance, but there was a call for the police?", nodding deep in thought "what time?", looking at Kerry's face she didn't seem that surprised but more hope or something "I'm getting the details and log of the call sent through, they couldn't tell me much or wouldn't, but will send through what they can", with a smile on his face "You would miss me around here Kerry?", not even looking at him "as much as I miss smoking", starting to walk away Leon calls out "did you smoke?", seeing Kerry turn around giving him one of her looks before walking to a desk near Leon.

Turning around again later "the call was made from a mobile phone, I've traced it to Kirsten King about 1.30 am", seeing Kerry give him a small smile her voice barely audible "Thanks". Looking at Kerry he sees her raising her eyebrows very slightly at him "what now Leon?", shaking his head "I thought you'd want more details than that", trying to keep her face neutral "Just send me through her mobile number and I'll pass it on", ignoring the look on Leons face of disbelief.

Looking at Kerry, as he gave her the information, it just didn't add up, she seems too casual not showing much interest, in the information he gave her, it just wasn't Kerry not able to read her reaction, he just hopes she doesn't do something stupid.

…..

Walking out of base a couple of hours later, Kerry calls out to Leon "I'll be on my phone if you need me otherwise I'll see you tomorrow?", looking at Kerry slightly suspicious of her "You going back home", seeing her nod and not saying anything before walking out to her car.

Pulling up at the house, the address in her hand, Kerry wonders if she should of rung and spoken to Kirsten instead of turning up, no this way she can't say not or avoid her. Knocking on the front door it isn't long before it is answered, looking at the female, she hopes it is Kirsten, "Kirsten King?", seeing her look at her "depends upon who's asking?", bringing out her badge "Superintendent Kerry Vincent from Tactical Response", seeing Kirsten's eyes open slightly wider as she nods "Yeah, what's this about?", opening the door "Can I come in", seeing Kirsten nod, Kerry follows her inside. Looking around the house, she walks into the lounge room seeing Kirsten facing her now looking slightly nervous, "You made a call last night, to the police about 1.30 am, what was that about?", looking at the superintendent Kirsten wondered if someone would come or find out the call was from her phone, nodding but saying nothing "How did you know it was from my phone," looking down Kerry sees the mobile on the table, before turning to face her "this your phone", nodding "Yeah so what if it is?", seeing Kerry bending down to pick it up "You can't go through my phone, you need a warrant for that", shaking her head at Kirsten "Not if I want to see what numbers you have called"

Looking at the officer in front of her, Kirsten looks away from her, she wants to forget the night before, what happened and what she saw, the name of the person in front her slightly familiar, racking her brain to remember, why the name rings a bell. Seeing her picking up her phone, she looks nervous.

Sighing at Kirsten, wanting her to open up "You don't have to give your name, they have a log of all calls coming in, and the phone it came from" seeing how nervous and scared she was looking, Kerry walks over to her, her voice soft "Can you tell me what your saw and why you called the police?"

Shaking her head, walking away from Kerry "I just want to forget last night ever happened, you can leave now?"

Opening up the phone log, she goes through the numbers, not that many, seeing the emergency number, just as she is about to close it, she glances at a number and name on the screen, looking up at Kirsten her mouth open, staring at Kirsten "How did you know James?",


	3. Chapter 3

Part 3

Seeing her eyes dart around, Kerry realises how scared she is, walking closer to her, trying to keep her voice calm and gentle "You're a friend of his" seeing her nod "You were with him last night when this happened, when he died?" shaking her head "Look I don't know anything", walking over to her, putting her hands gently on her arm "Talk to me Kirsten, let me help you, I need to find out what happened to James, you'll be safe", looking up at Kerry "your James's mum? You can't promise me that even if you are a cop" Her voice firmer "Kirsten, just tell me what happened, was James taking drugs again?"

Closing her eyes she looks at Kerry, trying to avoid her face, looking down and fiddling with her hands her voice barely a whisper "No, not that I was aware of" then shrugging "but maybe he was and I didn't know",

Looking at Kirsten, Kerry wonders if she was his girlfriend, she knew he had one in rehab, but from memory had they broken up, she didn't even know that of her son, "How well did you know James?" looking at Kerry "Quite well" seeing Kerry raise her eyebrows what was quite well.

Not wanting to pry too much "What happened last night, why did you call the police, did you see what happened and who they were"

Closing her eyes, trying to block out the image that is haunting her, fiddling with her hands again, her voice barely a whisper she tells Kerry what happens

Looking at Kirsten, "are you able to give a description of the guys, did you hear them calling each other any name?" nodding "it was dark, two were about James height, wearing Jeans, and white shirts, nothing that stood out, as we walked away, one could of called the other, or talked about a guy called Steve?".

Standing up "I need you to come to base, and give a description" seeing Kirsten look at her, "You will be safe, they have gotten what they wanted now, you need to do this for James" before walking out

….

Driving away from Kirsten's, Kerry pulls into the carpark at Docklands, walking up and around seeing people around her, guys the age of James, she stares out across the bay, how many times had James told her she was a shit mother, but a good cop, such a great cop she couldn't even save her son. How many times did she say I love you to James, did he even know she loved him, that she would do anything for him, risk everything for him, despite everything she was a better mum than her own mother. Did James know she loved having him.

Walking into the bar, ordering a drink and bottle of wine walking over to a table overlooking the bay, was James back on drugs and not even his friends picked up on it, despite what Kirsten told her, even they didn't know.

Walking out of the bar, late that evening early hours of the morning, Kerry looks around, not wanting to go back to the empty house, her head spinning slightly, getting out her phone, the missed calls from Lawson, can't he just give up and leave her alone.

Arriving at Crown Casino the early hours of the morning, hearing the noise from the poker machines and the tables, not wanting to drink alone, or even think, walking over to the table, the alcohol making her brain fuzzy, the anger building up in her, coming out at the guy dealing the cards, seeing him stopping ignoring the looks upon her.

Feeling hands on her she turns around looking at security, yelling out at them "get your hands off me" showing her badge to them, making no difference to them "come with us". Shaking them off, dismissing them "Piss off, I'm with the police, superintendent Kerry Vincent from Tactical Response" seeing them raise their eyes at her, not really caring, "We still need you to come with us", glaring at them "No", looking at them her face set hard, as they continue "can we see your licence", shaking her head "No…I'm going"

Walking out to Southbank, Kerry looks at her watch, "Oh shit", looking around trying to remember where she left her car. Walking out to the road looking around for a taxi, turning away to walk back to clear her head. Hearing a car horn she looks up seeing Lawson there, shaking her head "Oh shit" hearing his voice "Kerry, get in the car", glaring at Lawson, but better than walking, she hops in the car, seeing his amused smile on his face "abusing staff now?", glaring even more at him "Just take me to my car?", raising his eyes at her "sure that is a good idea?", rolling her eyes at him "stop being a smart arse Lawson, just get me to my car", not able to contain the smile "where is the car?", closing her eyes trying to remember "you do remember where you parked your car", not even looking at him "Docklands car park". Driving along, Lawson looks at Kerry ""You really think going out and getting drunk is helping", seeing Kerry turn to glare at him "what I do is nothing to do with you", trying not to laugh "except I'm the one that is here taking you to your car, " not even letting him finish "No one asked you to ", raising his eyebrows at her "No, except you go around creating scenes at Crown Casino Kerry, what did you expect to happen?", not even looking at Lawson, sick of his speaking. "Can't you just shut up….what am I meant to be doing Lawson, talk to you, your such a self righteous prick", smiling at Kerry, the name calling is nothing new, if anything he is used to it, but usually being called a smart arse."

Arriving at the carpark, Kerry looks around for her car "it all looks the same", shaking his head at Kerry "that's why there is numbers and letters Kerry, so you know where to park" not even looking at Lawson "I'll remember that" as she looks around

Looking at Lawson "I remember now, there is another car park.", stopping the car Lawson turns to Kerry "Get out?", looking at Lawson in surprise "what?" turning to look at her "You heard me, you don't want my help, so find your own car", opening the door, still looking at Lawson and the look on his face "Oooooookkk….i'll just be late to work", seeing him look at her "should of thought of that before, that's your problem Kerry, you just don't think, or take responsibility for your actions". Looking at him "See you when I get there Mr Responsibility" not even watching Lawson drive away.

Looking in the review mirror, Lawson sees Kerry walking away, wanting to turn around and help her.

….

Looking up at Kerry walks into base later the following morning, Leon looks at her looking like she had just got out of bed or a big night watching as she gets a drink of water "your starting to look like me", not even looking up "yeah….i've been out all…..i had a biiiiiiiig night" then shaking her head "why am I telling you this" as she walks away to the shower. Letting the water wash over her, trying to clear her, walking out a while later, Leon looks up, seeing her walk over to him "Send me all the information you can from the cameras surround William St and Queen Street" taking a deep breath, Leon knows what he is going to say, she will yell at him her voice low and firm "I can't Kerry" biting his lips as Kerry leans down closer to him "what do you mean You can't", leaning back in his seat away from her "Drug squad, doesn't want you to have any images or photos", seeing Kerry still close to him "I'll deal with them, just send me the information"

Typing away on the screen he turns to Kerry "They're blocked the camera, I can't go back to get any history"

Watching as an image flashes up on the screen, Kerry looks at Leon "this is it?", nodding "this is all I can get for you", hearing footsteps behind her, Kerry turns around smiling as she sees Kirsten enter, with another girl, someone who looks vaguely familiar, someone she had seen before, walking up to her "thanks for coming,", nodding at Kerry "this is Lisa", giving James girlfriend a slight smile before ushering them into the communications room.

Walking the girls out a short time later, Kerry sees Lawson walking towards her, cursing her bad luck, turning her back on him as she walks back towards the communications room, closing her eyes as she hears her name called out "Kerry", hearing footsteps hurrying after her, she feels his hand on her back, even through her shirt, she can feel his touch against her, the only person in TR that can get under her skin, the one person in TR she cares about more than anything, turning around to look at him, his eyes caring but worried about her "what was that about Kerry" shrugging her shoulders "helping with a line of enquiry" shaking his head "Kerry don't go there" seeing her eyes glaring at him "what did you want Lawson?" giving a short laugh "who said I wanted anything" her eyes wide open at him "why are you back here then?". Trying not to laugh "this TR base, and I am in TR", shaking her head glaring at him "stop being a smart arse" before turning her back on him walking back to her cubicle, picking up her bag, she turns to Leon "I'm on my mobile" before walking to her car

….

Arriving at Drug squad a short time later, taking a deep breath as she walks in, seeing the receptionist eyeing her warily, before running up the stairs again to the third floor, looking around she sees Chris, looking at her.

Seeing Kerry walking towards him, her eyes not sparkling her mouth in a straight line, her eyes fixed straight ahead, her body slightly tense, wondering what it is this time.

Stopping in front of her it isn't long before she speaks her voice loud "How dare you come into Tactical Response and tell my staff what they can and can't do, you can not alter Leon's access to the street cameras, Tactical response is MY team, you have no control over", walking closer to Kerry not wanting to raise his voice "This is a homicide and drug squad matter Kerry, not a Tactical Response". Not calming down or keeping her voice down "You thought it was a drug over dose. Tactical Response responds to all situations."

Looking at Kerry irate face "You're not thinking straight Kerry", taking a deep breath before responding to Chris "don't give me that crap Chris, what your suddenly looking into it?"

Pulling Kerry into his office, she turns to face him "You let me do my job Chris, stop restricting my intel officer, its bullshit what your doing." Raising his eyes at Kerry "Just step back from it Kerry, let us do our job and if there is a homicide we'll look into it and do something" Shaking her head at him "Your pretty shit at it, have you found anything yet?", her eyes looking around his office, instead of Chris, they fall on a folder on his desk, seeing James on top of it, she wonders if it is about James, quickly looking elsewhere, trying not to let Chris know that she sees the folder, her eyes going back to him, looking at him "you need to find out who's done it"

Looking back at Kerry into her eyes, sadness there and anger "I'm not giving up Kerry, we are trying", turning to walk out "Just try harder" walking out.

Walking into the bathroom, going into the cubicle, she takes a deep breath, walking out and leaning against the cubicle she splashes water over herself, walking out she looks around, before quietly going into the office again she looks around, opening up the file, she quickly looks at the content/information, seeing it is about James, she takes out her mobile, quickly taking photos of some pages. Looking at some of the pages, she takes what she wants, quickly putting them into her bag, Walking to the door, she opens it slightly looking around, she sees no one before walking out.

Arriving back at base, it is later that night, looking around she sees both TR cars back, walking inside the place looks empty with no one around, walking towards her cubicle she sits down, working away with no one around, before getting up, getting what she needs, she walks out towards her car, glad that no one is there to see what she is doing or having to explain herself.

…

Driving back to her house, it isn't long before she pours herself a glass of wine, and getting out the information in front of her, going through it all, as much as she would of loved to find out more, there is no way she was asking Leon or getting him involved.

Sitting on the lounge, the empty bottles of wine, on the table, opening the next one, Kerry hears a knock on the front door, ignoring it, she hears a voice "Open up Kerry, I know your in there" rolling her eyes, even though no one can see, why can't Lawson leave her alone, why can't he understand that she doesn't want to see anyone, doesn't want to speak to anyone, all she wants is the bottle and her. Hearing the knocking getting louder and Lawson's voice calling out "Kerry open the door, I'm not going away".

Shoving the papers under the cushion of the lounge, Kerry walks to the door, opening the door she rolls her eyes before turning her back and walking back inside "I'm fine Lawson, Don't you get sick of coming here each night Lawson, sure you have better things to do, like spending it with your girlfriend, just go home"

Giving a short laugh, Lawson didn't expect a welcoming committee from her, he didn't expect to be greeted at all, he knew her too well, also knew that she wouldn't ask for help even if she needed it or show that she wasn't coping or anything. Shaking his head at Kerry "Nah, I like coming here each night, get the door closed in my front, bad company, not even offered a drink"

Trying not to smile at Lawson "I don't need looking after Lawson" Smiling at Kerry "I never said you did need looking after, was driving past, so dropped in… can't I be slightly concerned?" seeing her raise her eyebrows at him "Is that what you call it, Lawson I'm fine, I don't need you coming over each night" " seeing Lawson looking at her, giving her one of his looks, not believing her "Kerry its me Lawson here, talk to me", her eyes darting around her place, she doesn't want to look at Lawson, doesn't want to look at his face, seeing the sympathy there.

Wanting to reach out and touch Kerry, get her to talk to him, looking around he sees the empty bottles on the table, he should of known she would turn to alcohol, it was not secret that she liked to drink, he hated seeing her like this, he had a soft spot for her, had for ages. How he wish she wasn't so stubborn, wanting to do everything herself. Walking over to her, he touches her on the arm, wanting her to face him.

Feeling Lawson's touch on her arm, it was no secret to herself, that she had liked Lawson for years, not wanting him to see her like this, why can't he just go away, leave her alone, looking up at him "Lawson just leave", shaking his head "I'm not going Kerry", watching as she takes a huge sip from the glass "You shouldn't be drinking so much", seeing Kerry turn to glare at him "what am I meant to be doing Lawson, tell me, you seem to think you know everything", watching Kerry turn her back to him, he is used to her outbursts, and all, "You can say what you want, but you're not getting rid of me", sighing deeply at him "Lawson I'm fine, I just want to be by myself" then getting her phone "Look I'll put your number on speed dial. Laws, and if I want to talk or want anything then I'll give you a call, now just go"

Seeing him stay still, she just wants to be by herself, deep down she is grateful he is coming over each night, but she doesn't want him involved, giving him a half smile "I'm tired Lawson, I'm just going to bed. There not after me Lawson, these guys have got what they want"

Seeing Lawson not moving but sitting down, looking at her "Lawson, I'm fine, go home, they are not going to come after me", looking at Kerry was he that see through, "you don't know that Kerry" sipping her drink as she nods "they're gutless Lawson, look what they did to James, I'm not the ones they are after. I've got your number on speed dial, I'll look the door, now go home to Shannon"

Smiling at Kerry, she can be so stubborn "I'll go, but I'm getting patrol to come around each hour" moving her eyes around "If that will get rid you yes"

Getting up off the lounge, slightly unsteady on her feet, she sees Lawson get up steadying her, staring up into his brown eyes, she feels his hand on her arms, damm Lawson, why is he so close to her, feeling his hand lingering on her arm, she looks up at him, seeing him looking at her, staring into her blue eyes, moving slightly closer to him, she feels his lips upon hers, feeling his arms wrap around her as he kisses her more heavily. Even as much ass he has had to drink she pulls away, pushing him away from her "go home Lawson" before walking up stairs.

Walking back to his car, Lawson sits in the drivers seat, what did he just do, did he just kiss Kerry, no it was nothing, pulling away from the curb, he texts Shannon, driving back to his place for the night.


	4. Chapter 4

Part

Walking into TR the following morning into the communications room, Leon turns to Lawson "Kerry isn't coming in for a few days," looking at Leon in surprise also wondering why Kerry didn't let him know as Leon continues "she is taking some leave, did she tell you?" Shaking his head at Leon before turning away, he hears Leon call out "she left you a list of things to do" walking back in "Kerry was here?" nodding at Lawson "yeah she picked up some things and left, was only here for maybe 10 minutes, then she called", walking out of the room there is no way Kerry would just take leave, hopping in TR1.

Hearing a knock on the door, Kerry answers it, seeing Lawson standing there, turning her back on him before walking back inside. Walking over to the counter, putting stuff away before turning to face him waiting for him to speak "how long are you going away for" shrugging at Lawson looking away from him "I'm having a few days off work Lawson that's all", walking closer to Kerry "That's all…Kerry, you never take time off work " turning around glaring at Lawson "this time I am Lawson, what do you want, why did you come here?"

Looking at Kerry concern in his eyes "I'm worried about you" interrupting him "don't be, I'm fine Lawson, you can go back to work and stop worrying about me"

Walking closer to her "when will you be back?" looking at him in the eyes "can't cope without me eh" rolling his eyes at her "that's not it". Nodding at her getting no where "enjoy your time off" moving her tongue around her mouth "enforced time" smiling slightly at her, made more sense now, her outbursts no doubt not going unnoticed. Seeing Lawson staring at her "I'm fine Lawson, so go"

Walking out of the apartment, seeing Kerry standing there looking at him.

Watching Lawson walk out, she suspected he might come, walking back to her computer, she prints out what she needs hearing the taxi beep its horn she picks up the bags she needs before closing the door behind her.

Arriving at the hotel, she wouldn't stay here by choice it is a better hotel than most, but she wouldn't even stay in the area if she had a choice, putting her things away she looks at the gun, hiding it before walking out. She had put this part of her life behind her years ago, when she became a cop, swearing she would never come back to this area or have anything to do with it.

Arriving at the bar a short time later Kerry casually looks around no one in their right mind would be a female alone in this bar or side of town was she crazy many would say yes, but on a mission she opens the door looking around breifly, yep they are here, driving past the house earlier that morning, she got a glimpse of who she is looking for. Walking up to the bar ordering a drink, checking her reflection briefly yep she looks exactly how she wanted too, not showing her age of 47. Picking up her drink she sits at the bar, it isn't long before she feels someone sitting next to her, looking into the eyes as she hears the voice "your new here, don't see many females here", turning back around, trying to act casual before looking at them again then nodding "do you have some gear?" seeing them look at her more closely as she tries to act casual " I heard you were the guy to get some from" shrugging and getting up from her seat "If I was wrong I'll go elsewhere" as she starts to walk out.

Feeling their eyes upon her, as she walks out, not turning around as she hears footsteps behind her "not too fast", turning around staring at them, her blue eyes piercing through them showing no emotion, she didn't get where she was today for nothing hearing them speak "what are you after?"

Handing over the money, after getting the drugs, she checks out the bag, nodding she walks back to the hire car she had. She needs to start of small, driving away she keeps her eyes on the review mirror, her cop instincts kicking in, not wanting to give away where she is staying, smiling to herself, she was right as she sees a car in the distance behind her, it isn't long before she is able to loose them, as she drives back to the hotel.

…..

Putting his gun away the following evening, checking them all off, one is missing shaking his head he knew something was up with her, looking at Kerry's office, Lawson is worried, he knows Kerry too well, walking out to the communications room seeing Leon packing up for the evening "Did Kerry say anything on the phone", shaking his head "just that she was going away, for a few days" then looking up at Lawson "You don't think she would do anything stupid, that she is just going away", turning away from Leon, he doesn't want to answer or think about it, turning away from Leon, getting out his phone to call her as it goes to voice mail, he sees Leon looking at it "she turned her phone off a while ago" he doesn't want to answer or think about it, "Keep trying to call her, and find out where she is going"

Hpping in his car, taking out his phone to call her, as the phone goes to voice mail "damm you Kerry, answer the phone" he drives to her place, seeing her car there he walks up to the front door, knocking loudly waiting for an answer, walking around the house, the lights off damm her, he should of followed his instincts.

Walking into base the following morning he walks up to Leon whispering "do you know if Kerry's leave was enforced leave?" shaking his head at Lawson, wondering what is happening, last night and again now, did Kerry do something stupid "I don't think so, I think she asked for time off, and they gave it to her", walking over to the phone, slamming it down a short time later before walking over to Leon, " are you able to put a trace on Kerry's phone?", looking up at Lawson "what's going on here" ignoring his question "Just do it Leon", turning to Lawson, "your sounding more like Kerry" then facing the screen again "her phone is still turned off, I can only trace the phone if it is on and makes a call" then facing Lawson "why don't you just go around to her place" rolling his eyes at Leon "why didn't I think of that" then his voice louder "I already have she bloody isn't home, her car is" this time not looking at him "maybe she just doesn't want to speak to you" not able to control his anger, and Leon's annoying attitude "she wasn't there Leon, and it is up to you to find out where she is", looking at Lawson leaning back on his chair "I'm only as good as the computer" leaning down to Leon ":you better hope the computer is good then"

Facing the screen "It looks like she doesn't want to be found, I can put a trace if she uses her e tag, and if she turns her phone on we'll be notified" then looking at Lawson "if you get clearance I can get access to her credit card" looking at the screen "just do it Leon" not looking at Lawson "I need special clearance", leaning down close to him "don't tell me you haven't done it before, I'll get your bloody clearance just do it now"

Logging into the computer as her bank statement comes up on screen, turning to Lawson "If she doesn't want to be found, you won't be able too" not even looking at Leon, but aware of the fact "what about her savings accounts, can you access that?" typing away "you need two forms of clearance for that Lawson, you haven't seen Kerry angry, she is scary" seeing Lawson glaring at him "you have nothing on Kerry" rolling his eyes at Leon "How long will it take to get the clearance" shrugging "maybe an hour, if I know its on its way I can log in then".

Walking over to the phone, it isn't long before Lawson is back "its coming through now" typing away at the computer, it isn't long before both accounts are up on the screen, looking straight away Leon points to an amount, she withdrew $2000 two days ago" seeing Lawson point to something on her credit card "enlarge that", zooming in "care rental Place" looking up at Lawson "a dodgy one at that" nodding talking more to himself than Leon "I don't like it, I have a bad feeling about this". Turning around in his seat looking at Lawson "Kerry can take care of herself" starting to walk away "I know" then turning looking at Kerry's cubicle then back at Leon "are you able to log into Kerry's computer or find out what she has been looking up the last few days?" nodding at Lawson speaking into his com "Pete, can you come down for a minute", waiting for Pete to arrive he follows Lawson into Kerry's cubicle, he watches as Lawson opens up her drawers "are you allowed to do that?" not even looking at Leon "at the moment I don't really care, Kerry is going to do something stupid and I need to stop it, stuff protocol" smiling at Lawson, Leon didn't think he would ever hear Lawson say that.

Typing away at the computer he feels Lawson breathing over his shoulder, deep in thought each word he puts in not working, "cmon Leon", putting up his hand closing his eyes turning away mumbling to himself before turning back to the computer, typing in the password as the screen open up. Feeling Lawson lean down "can you find what she has been looking at", looking up at Lawson "the history" nodding "yes" typing away he comes up blank "she's deleted most of it"

Hearing a voice call out "Lawson" walking out of the office he sees Detective Finch "Chris, how are you" seeing the solumn face "Is Kerry around?" shaking his head "she's taken some time off," nodding at Lawson "Is she at home?" looking at Chris not a smile on his face, wondering what Kerry and done "what's this about Chris?" moving away motioning for Lawson to follow him "There are some files missing at Drug Squad" Lawson didn't even need to ask whose file but needing to make sure "James?" nodding as Lawson continues "did they contain names in it", the need to defend Kerry "Kerry wouldn't of taken them" seeing Chris look at him "are you sure about that, she is a pretty determined person" unable to reply, he isn't sure and part of him, is sure that she did, and along with the gun she has taken, knows exactly who she is after, and the way she is thinking, would probably do anything to pay back the people who killed James. Seeing Chris watching him "I just hope she knows what she is doing"


	5. Chapter 5

PART 4

Looking at Chris, Lawson needs to know "are you going to take it any further? Looking back at Lawson as much as he would love too but also knowing what Kerry went through "I should… but I'm going to leave it for the time being" smiling gratefully at Chris, before taking out his mobile, hearing it going to voice mail "Kerry call me as soon as you get this" walking away into his com "Shan, come back to base" then turning to Leon "send through the details of the car rental place"

Walking out of the car rental place a short time later, shaking his head, the guy totally unhelpful at least they got the type of car and number plate seeing Shannon looking at him "going to tell us what is going on?" ignoring Shannon he had no idea what was going on, all he knew was he had to find Kerry before she did something she regretted, the state of her mind, he knew she would do something she would regret later.

…..

Driving away from the motel, turning on her phone, listening to the messages all from either Lawson or Leon, shutting her phone "Sorry guys not today" knowing it wouldn't be long before they put it together, she wouldn't even be surprised if Lawson had been back to her house.

Hearing a noise on the screen Leon looks up, then into his com "Lawson, Kerry's phone is turned on, I'm trying to get the position now", watching the screen "she is heading along Fitzroy Road, just passed Careel Street".

Getting out his phone, Lawson dials Kerry number, hearing it ring, but after a few rings goes straight to message bank.

Hearing her phone ring, she looks at the screen "No way Lawson" picking it up she turns it off, no way is she having Leon or anyone find out where she is.

Hearing Leons voice coming through the coms "her phone is turned off", I'm going through the traffic cameras now, but it will take a while, and can only do the main streets." Slamming his fist on the dashboard he sees Shannon looking at him, her eyes raised at his actions. Hearing Stella's voice from the back "are you going to tell us what's going on here Lawson?" not even looking at Stella "Just leave it Stel" seeing Shannon watch him closely "Kerry's done something again hasn't she?" seeing Lawson ignore her question as she continues "do you even know where we're going?" Not looking at Shannon "Just drive…she needs our help", her eyes straight ahead "she never wants your help", hearing Stellas voice from the back "If she doesn't want to be found Lawson, there is nothing you can do"

Staring at the screen, it looks blank to him, not able to think, blinking again before into his coms "Lawson, she has just used the east link, past Wellington Bridge and Dandenong also…..maybe she is just going away?". Listening to Leon, where the hell is Kerry going and what is she doing, knowing Kerry there is no way she is just going away.

…..

Walking into Drug Squad a few days later Lawson looks around, hoping it isn't what he fears but seeing Detective Finch along with Detective Grayner walking towards him, following them into an office he sees photos on a table Kerry at a table with a guy, handing over packages in a park, looking closer to the photos he rubs his hand across his face "shit Kerry" looking up at Chris "why are you showing me these?".

Looking at Lawson he is sure he saw surprise in his eyes "Have you heard from Superintendent Vincent?" shaking his head he doesn't want to give them information about Kerry, seeing Detective Grayner look at him "Do you know who these people are, his face showing nothing but shaking his head "am I meant to?", picking up the photo the guy Kerry is sitting with "this guy is Col Williams a well known drug dealer, someone we have been following for a while" looking back at the detectives picking up the photo of Kerry at the table "this photo doesn't prove anything" seeing Chris turn to Detective Grayner who then walks out of the room before facing Lawson "this is one of the guys we think are in the drug ring that could be responsible for James' death. I just hope Kerry knows what she is getting herself into.", needing to know Lawson looks back at Chris "what happens now?" seeing Chris not impressed "I have to try to convince e drug squad to stop their raid they are planning in a few days on one of the William's places, or hope this is a one off" nodding at Chris "where was this taken?" looking back at Lawson "you can't go there Lawson, what ever Kerry is up to, you could put her life at risk" leaning closer to Chris "Kerry isn't even thinking straight, her life is at risk now anyway" moving away from Lawson "what will you do if I told you Lawson, search the area, ask about her, leave it up to drug squad, this is my investigation" glaring at Chris "just keep me updated" before walking away.

….

Looking up at the screen, Leon into his com "Lawson there has been reports of a kidnapping, someone being forced into a car, at the wharf, I'm logging into the security cameras and CCTV footage now" going through the cameras, the shock on his face, hearing Lawson walking out to the car he calls out to him, before walking towards him, following Leon, not making much sense, looking up at the cameras "Oh shit" nodding at Lawson before looking at him "TR2 is on their way there now" looking at the screen "Can you get the number plate" zooming in for Lawson "that car was reported as stolen about an hour ago" then closing his eyes putting up his hand towards Lawson then typing away as a screen comes up on the computer, shaking his head "there's no cameras where the car was stolen" seeing Lawson glance towards Kerry's room, would she kidnap and steal a car looking back at Leon "can you get an Id on this guy" watching as an image comes up on the screen "Max Williams" looking at his priors there isn't a lot there, Lawson closes his eyes does he want to know Williams, he has to be related to Col, what the fuck does she think she's doing "Please tell me he isn't related to Col Williams" looking at the screen as he reads his profile shaking his head seeing Leon looking up at him as he walks out "Send me through the number plate and see if you can find where Kerry is headed"

….

Arriving at the waterfront, pushing Max out of the car with a gun trailled upon him seeing him look at her 'you don't want to do this, my father will come after you" staring at him her face blank, void of expression "Its time for your father to know what its like to lose a son, to have one killed for no reason, so walk"

With her gun aimed on Max, they stop near the water her eyes fixed on him, now she is here can she do it, could she shoot him, could she kill someone in cold blood. "Why did you kill James?" seeing him look at her "Don't know who your talking about…What's it to you, why you wanta know" looking at him a hardness on his face "the question is how badly do you want to live….."

Looking at Kerry her eyes cold and hard, not wavering or blinking, he has to admit he is scared he has had brushes before, but looking at the woman before him, he is starting to feel scared looking up at Kerry, feeling Kerry push him towards the edge of the water, looking down below at the waves pounding against the pylons the fear in his eyes "Raynor Milner is the guy you want, he is the one who killed James" feeling the hold of Kerry still on him "he gave him the drugs, and made him take them, I had nothing to do with it" leaning him further forward "why" taking deep breaths "you need to ask my father that, I'm not like him" feeling Kerry moving him further towards the water "If James testified, my father would go to jail, his business…. You really don't want to mess with him, there is so much more going on than you realise, you don't want to be part of it, get out of it whilst you can"

Her eyes looking around, out across the water, her grip not loosening on him, pulling him up, before pushing him against the wall, tying his hands up, her gun trained on him "Where do I find Raynor?" her eyes not moving from him "You really don't want to mess with him, he is dangerous" her eyes cold "I'll ask you again where do I find Raynor?" Looking up at Kerry "QT bar" nodding she knows where that is, wondering if there was links between him and the Raineys "there also is a warehouse out at Carlton" finishing his sentence "a drug lab" nodding at Kerry. Looking at Max, was he that scared he told her what she wanted walking closer to him a warning tone to her voice her eyes cold "you better not be bullshitting me" trying to move away from her, shit she scared him, he had seen some psychos in his day, and dealt with dangerous people, but there was something about her, something that did scare him, "give me your phone" looking up at her "bit hard with my hands tied" moving closer to him, grabbing him by the shirt and pulling him up, grabbing his phone before pushing him back down, tying him to a pole, dialling tactical response base "Leon" not letting him speak "send a car down to the waterfront reports of shots fired" hanging up the phone tossing it to Max seeing the fear in his eyes as she fires her gun, inches from his head, before putting the gun behind her tucked into her pants.

…..


	6. Chapter 6

Hearing the dial tone Leon into his com "Lawson get down to the waterfront, now shots fired" then pausing "Kerry called it in", seeing the look on Shannon's face and Stella's trying to ignore it, not wanting people to know anything "did she say anything" shaking his head before into the com "it wasn't her phone, was trying to get a trace on it but the phone call was short I managed to triangulate it to around that area, all she said was shots fired"

Pulling up a short time later, looking around into his com "did she say where" Leon "negative all she said was shots fired, I'm logging into the CCTV cameras now, going through the whole waterfront"

Going through the cameras "Lawson, go to the front near the loading docks" rewinding through the tapes putting his hand up to his mouth "shit" as he sees Kerry raise her gun and fire

Hearing Lawson's voice come through "Leon, get an Id on this guy, is it Max Williams?" waiting for the facial recognition to come through "Yes" then dialling Lawson's number "Kerry was the one who tied the guy up, you need to see the footage Lawson, you need to find Kerry before…." Not able to tell Lawson what he really thinks, whispering to himself more than anyone "easier said than done" then louder to Leon "she doesn't want to be found, keep on it Leon and let me know what you find". Untying the guy Shannon looks at him "who did this to you" shaking his head "she is crazy, she's going to get herself killed" looking up at Lawson who has walked over "bring him back to base" seeing Shannon looking at him "what about the GD's and detectives they'll be here shortly" staring at Shannon his voice firm "bring him back to base", watching Lawson walk over to the car, slamming his fist against the dashboard, seeing Stella look at her and back to Lawson.

…

Driving to the warehouse, parking her car a short distance away, taking out the binoculars and having a look around, she sees only two cars, watching as one drives away she gets closer, putting her gun tucked into her pants behind her, she walks towards the warehouse looking through the window, seeing no one there, she opens the door quietly, walking inside, seeing the equipment there, her eyes looking around, no sign of anyone, hearing a voice coming from another room, the voice getting louder coming towards her, looking around, quickly finding a hiding spot, seeing one person coming out, smelling gas "oh shit" someone had turned the gas on, watching Raynor she wonders how long before the whole place will go up, doesn't he realise walking out of the shadows her gun poised "move away from the bench" seeing him quickly pick up a gun and fire it up her, moving away and firing back at him, backing towards the door, watching as Raynor comes towards her, firing at her, firing back at him as she hears an explosion, diving towards the ground away from the building as far as she can.

….

Looking up at the screen "Lawson, there is an explosion at Carlton" not wanting to take the job "get someone else to take it Leon" seeing Stella look at him "picking and choosing jobs now Lawson" shaking his head "Its not a tactical response job" looking in the rearview mirror, Stella sees Shannon raising her eyes. Hearing Leon's voice coming through "I think you'll want this one Lawson, the explosion is at a factory belonging to…." In no mood for Leon's stupidity his voice warning "Leon" laughing at Lawson "Col Williams…. It's a drug lab, I've tried to log into their security cameras but it is pretty high tech" hearing Stella's voice come through "too good for you hey Leon" not one to admit defeat "No, I will get through it, I just need some time, I've put the address on your screen" nodding and turning to Stella "I'm already on my way" then into his com "send me through any details

Arriving at the factory a short time later, seeing the fireman walk out, walking up to them as they speak to him "there is a body inside, it is pretty badly burnt from the explosion" nodding at the fireman, not wanting to think about the cause or who might of caused it "do you know what caused it" shaking his head "we still have to investigate" looking up as another car arrives he sees Detective Finch get out walking towards him "any word from Kerry yet" shaking his head as Chris continues "we'll take over now" walking closer to Chris "this is still a Tactical Response operation" looking at Lawson "you need to find Kerry, at the moment things are not looking good for her" hearing his phone ring, seeing the ID walking away from Chris "Leon, this better be good news"

Looking at the screen, how he wishes he had good news, but from what he can find he doesn't want to think about it "I can log into the outside cameras, the inside have been damaged in the explosion, you don't want to see this, a green car turns up and" finishing his sentence closing his eyes "Kerry gets out of the car" nodding at Lawson's reply "all I can tell, is she falls over from the explosion" not able to continue "Lawson you just need to see the footage".

Glancing over at Chris, he has no doubt that Chris will find out that Kerry is there, but he isn't going to tell him, despite him wanting to follow the rules, Kerry is in deep shit and he can't make it any worse, turning to Stella "go around the perimeter and see what you can find" then walking up to the fireman "Is it safe to go inside yet" seeing him look at Lawson, not unless your suited up nodding at them "get me a suit then" seeing the glare of Chris upon him he enters the building he has to know what happened in here, finding the body walking over to it, even burnt, he can see the bullet shots around the area "shit, what happened in here"

Turning to walk outside he sees Chris inside, he needs to find Kerry and fast. Heading towards TR1, he hears Chris call out, turning around seeing Chris walk up to him "Have you heard from Kerry" not answering his question "Lawson I want to try to help her here, it isn't looking good for her" staring at Chris not able to say anything as much as he wants to believe that Kerry wouldn't do this, part of him can't help but think maybe she did but he still hears himself say "she wouldn't do this". Watching one of Chris's men walk over to him, he walks back to Lawson "I'm sorry Lawson but a kalof is put out for Kerry" his mouth open looking at Chris as he shakes his head "your looking for the wrong person" as he starts to walk back to TR, he hears Chris's voice "Lawson if I find out you're helping Kerry or know where she is I'll" interrupting him "you'll do what Chris, I'm not going to help you find Kerry" shaking his head at Lawson "for Kerry's sake and your own, I would strongly advise to help us" not even looking at Chris as he walks towards TR1 "I'm not doing your job for you Chris, why don't you find out who killed James" .

…..

Getting dropped back at base, Lawson walks into the communications room looking around "show me Leon" opening up the screen, he looks up at Lawson zooming in on a person that looks familiar no, different hair cut but still similar it can't be, pausing the screen yes it is, glancing up at Lawson "shit Leon, you haven't shown this to anyone else?" shaking his head looking up at Lawson "it looks like she knows what she is doing and isn't forced" nodding at Leon his eyes glued to the screen watching Kerry walk towards the car, putting her gun away. Not even looking at Leon "is this the only camera you have access off, can you get any close of the building, of Kerry leaving?" glancing at Lawson "she wouldn't shoot someone" not saying anything Lawson didn't think she would either but the Kerry lately he wasn't too sure, and after being to the site, the evidence is mounting up on her "don't show this to anyone Leon, especially drug squad"

….

Walking with Lawson out of the base, Shannon looks at him "Lawson you need to help Chris, this is your career we're talking about here, Kerry's son was a junkie, you can't throw away everything you've worked for" not even looking at Shannon his mouth in a straight line "Shannon, he wasn't a junkie, he was killed" opening her mouth slightly surprised at that "he used to be, even you have to admit, you have your doubts and think Kerry was responsible today" shaking his head and continuing walking "Kerry would never kill someone" even as he said it part of him wondered what was she capable of at the moment, not really listening to Shannon "Kerry, does things her own way, she hit Ben across the knees with a tyre lever when James went missing" then facing Lawson "she doesn't think Lawson, you have no idea what she is capable off" pushing Shannon away from him "either do you Shan, what about some loyalty here, she's your boss, someone who has defended you, helped you and all you do is think the worse" biting her lip as Lawson walks on she is worried about Lawson "you need to tell Chris where Kerry is?" his voice raised at Shannon "I have no idea where Kerry is and if I did I wouldn't tell him or you" feeling like Lawson had slapped her reeling back slightly "what's up your arse Lawson, you aren't responsible for Kerry or her actions" turning to face Shannon "no, but she needs our help" looking at him her voice loud "she doesn't want it Lawson" glaring at Shannon his face slightly hard "I'm not giving up on finding her and helping her"

Driving home in silence, Shannon looks around as they pull up at her place, looking at Lawson confused "are you coming in do you want to get a pizza and DVD" shaking his head his voice anger and pissed off "no, I'll see you tomorrow" looking at Lawson in disbelief "is this because I don't agree with what you're doing" not even looking at Lawson his voice firm "no, Kerry needs our support and your being a total bitch about it, and all she has ever given to any of the team is her support and help" looking at Lawson shaking her head her voice loud "she doesn't want it Lawson, Kerry does whatever she wants whenever she wants despite the consequences" then looking at Shannon "your one to talk Shannon, what about you and Lexie she gave you a second chance when she could of fired you…I don't want to hear you ever call Kerry's son a junkie again" looking into the car "well he is Lawson" not even looking at Shannon as he reaches over and pulls the door closes, screeching away from her place.

Watching as Lawson drives away surprised at his outburst she did nothing to deserve that from her boyfriend, Kerry didn't need Lawson or anyone's help.

…

Opening her eyes, looking around where was she, nothing really looked familiar pain searing through her body what happened to her how did she end up here. The pain coming again, this time Kerry knew where the pain was coming from, trying to look around to figure out where she was, the memory of what happened coming back to her.


	7. Chapter 7

How did she let this happen, she knew they were dangerous, she had let her guard down for a minute, shit how did they get onto her so quick, she didn't even see it coming, she was in deep shit now, and had to get out of it, she knew what they were capable off and her bloodied face she could feel the blood drip down and the pain she was feeling. She had to get out of here and now she must have passed out but how long she had no idea. How did they find out where she was staying, her eyes more opened, the surroundings did look slightly familiar she was still at the hotel being dragged towards another car, looking up trying to recognise the faces, hearing something in the distance no it was coming closer.

Looking down at Kerry, her bodied bloodied and bruised, looking up "help me get her into the boot" walking over to help him "I say just shoot and kill her now" feeling a hard hit to his face "are you stupid, want to bring the cops down here, what do you think gunshots will do, lets just put her in the car, have some fun with her first then kill her" a sadistic smile on their face "as long as both have some fun, pity we didn't have the fun first, before she was looking like this, she looked hot before" laughing at the remark "we don't have to touch her face…. Lets just put her in the boot then drive out to the bush, nice and isolated or down to the marina?"

Trying not to show fear on her face watching as they lean down, with all her strength, lifting up her leg, kicking them in the groin, hearing one of them moan "your going to pay for that bitch" looking down at her seeing determination, what is it with her anyone else in this situation would have fear, begging for them to stop but not her.

Walking over opening up the boot, before walking back to where she was shit where had she gone now calling out "Look bitch, we are going to find you and when we do you will pay, so make it easy and just come out" hearing sirens drawing closer looking at each other, seeing a police car coming down the street "lets get out of here" racing to the car they get in driving out of the carpark.

Trying to stay conscious was that sirens she heard, hearing a voice near her "We need an ambulance now"

…

Lying in hospital she knew Lawson would come in and be all Mr Blake on her, her eyes going right through him, looking at Kerry, "Talk to me Kerry, what's happening" seeing her eyes looking around, her body bruised and her face swollen "who did this", finally speaking "Just leave it Lawson" looking at her "you can't let them get away with this" her eyes showing no emotion staring practically straight through him "they wont" shaking his head his voice louder, wanting to strangle her get her to talk to him "what is going on here?"

Looking up at him her face blank "I will get those responsible for killing James" looking at her he had been so worried about her and it seemed for good reason, even after it all she was showing nothing, leaning closer "even if means getting yourself Killed, look at yourself Kerry, they nearly killed you probably would have if the police didn't turn up, you were lucky someone called them" looking up at him her eyes slightly cold "if that's what it takes ….. they didn't and next time… " leaning down closer to her what is going on with her, why is she willing to risk her life shaking his head at her "Next time Kerry they will probably kill you" looking up at Lawson her eyes fixed on his her lips in a straight line why didn't he get that she didn't care what happened to her these people killed her son they had to pay for what they did she could look after herself and nothing was going to get in her way, showing no emotion "that's a risk I'm willing to take" her eyes staring straight ahead she didn't want to talk or see Lawson anymore she should of known he wouldn't understand he was trying to protect her and she was sick of it "this time I will be ready for them". Looking at Kerry, she wasn't the person she knew, the person he would protect no matter was, he has no idea who this person lying in the bed was "Kerry these people killed James, and they will have no hesitation in killing you too" Looking up at Lawson her blue eyes going straight through him "I'd like to see them try, I will get them Lawson" looking at Kerry, there is a hardness in her voice, a hardness all over her, did he want to know "then what" seeing Kerry look him in the eye a coldness there "you don't want to know" shaking his head, no she wouldn't but looking at the person lying in the bed he really had no idea who she was "you wouldn't kill someone Kerry, I know you" walking closer to her "don't do it Kerry, don't ruin your life on revenge its not worth it" seeing Kerry look at him before moving her eyes away from him "don't tell me what to do Lawson not anymore … You don't know me Lawson"

Sitting on the chair near Kerry should he tell Chris after all that Kerry was here or in here, could he turn her over, he didn't want to but listening to her, he should just to protect herself "you know there Is a kalof out on you, Chris has issued a warrant for your arrest" looking down at Kerry "they think you set the fire at the warehouse and killed someone" looking up at Lawson in surprise saying nothing "are you going to tell him I'm in here" looking down at her, is he shrugging "I don't know, I should Kerry for your own good ….. did you set the fire?" looking up at Lawson, he really didn't know her did he think she was capable of killing someone "what do you think?" staring at her "I don't know Kerry I really don't…. I don't' want to think of it but….." Looking up at him "do what you have to do Lawson".

Walking out of the hospital, driving to the beach, walking around he isn't going to tell drug squad yet, but it won't be long until they find out she is in, he managed to stop it for now, he needs to convince her to stop it, he doesn't want to see her arrested, last time he thought he was doing the right thing and she was investigated by ESD she can't see her career ruined.

Walking into Kerry's room the next day he sees her dressed arguing with the doctor "what do you think you're doing" not even looking at Lawson, she knew his voice anywhere "I'm leaving" looking up at the doctor "against medical advice, she will need to sign papers, try to convince her to stay, she needs to rest for at least 48 more hours, there are no broken bones, but she is badly bruised and still awaiting results" watching as she walks over to the front desk signing the papers "look at yourself Kerry, you're not ready to leave, what good are you in the condition you are now". Ignoring Lawson, she can't stay longer she is surprised so far that Chris hasn't turned up she can't let anyone get in her way "I'm fine Lawson"

Walking out of the hospital, Lawson runs after her "Kerry, your not ready, listen to them" turning to face him, her blue eyes piercing through him, this time showing no emotion in them "Its my decision Lawson so fuck off and leave me alone" seeing him block her path her voice firm "get out of my way Lawson" not moving his eyes fixed on Kerry's he can't let her go he can't let her do something she would regret later on seeing her eyes staring at his, not backing down, seeing Lawson not moving, she pushes him hard.

Regaining his balance, partly shocked at Kerry's behaviour, grabbing her arm wondering where the Kerry Vincent he knew was "where are you going?" this time not even looking at him as she walks out the door "to get those responsible for killing James"

Watching Kerry walk out of the hospital, hailing a taxi, into his com "Stella how far away are you?" hearing her reply "a couple of minutes" hitting the pole near him, "Leon, I need you to log into the camera, and ring up silver Taxi's the registration Bravo Yankie 596 and find out where the driver dropped off the passenger, and where they are now"

Seeing TR1 pull up at the hospital closing the door "hurry up Stel" turning to face Lawson "I'm driving blind out here" then into her com "Leon I need directions anything"

Hanging up the phone "Lawson, the driver just dropped off the person at 12 Gregory Place, Seddon" seeing Stella and Christian look at him "are you able to track her car via the GPS on it" looking at the screen "Lawson, I don't think her car has a GPS built in, I'll see where she is going"

Looking straight ahead he knows where Kerry wants to go but where it is "Leon, give me a list of all Col Williams places anything he owns, send them through" seeing Stella look at him "isn't Kerry meant to be still in hospital" staring straight ahead shaking his head "she signed herself out" raising her eyesbrows at him "You let her leave hospital" not even looking at Stella his voice loud in frustration "I didn't let her leave, have you tried to stop Kerry doing something" then his voice barely audible "the person I saw wasn't Kerry, it was some person I didn't even know"

….

Walking into TR base, she had her keys she knew no one would be around well she hoped, she knew she was risking a lot but if she was right it was the last place they would think she would be going back too. Looking around, if she can get into the communications room and into her cubicle she would be right, both TR cars are back, no noises coming from the locker room, the tables empty she did miss this place, but she would be back here and soon. Walking into the communications room, and over to Leon's desk, it is messier than it has been typical with her not around, walking over to the trays of work, was there anything there that would help her. Walking over to what is her desk when she is not in her cubicle looking around yes, not having time to look at what she needed, grabbing the whole pile shoving it under her jacket walking quickly to the door, opening it and walking down the street to her car, not watching where she is going, walking into someone not even looking at them "watch where you're going idiot" looking up shit what is anyone doing back here, looking up at them the surprise evident on their face "Kerry?"


	8. Chapter 8

Looking at Leon and of all people Stella "what are you doing back here Leon?" looking at Kerry she looked so different, she actually looked hot. "Stella's giving me a lift home" seeing Kerry walk closer to him her voice nearly threatening "not a word of this to anyone Leon, I mean it or you will regret it" nodding and looking at Kerry she was scary previously but this was something different, there was something totally different about his boss and he was actually scared of her. Watching as she walks out of base, turning to Stella "that was weird". Watching Kerry walk out Stella turns to Leon "you need to tell Lawson" shaking his head "I can't Stella" turning to face Leon "what ever she was here for, it wasn't good, Lawson is worried about her and for good reason it seems, Leon you need to tell Lawson." looking down the road Kerry had vanished "I'll tell him tomorrow, what do you think she came to base for?" shaking her head at Leon "something she needed, she did look pretty hot though" smiling at Stella there was something different about her.

…

Walking into work the following morning Leon knew he had to tell Lawson, and probably should of told him last night. Seeing Lawson already in at his desk already confused. Hearing Leon come in, maybe he knew he had searched for a while now, looking for the paperwork he had gathered and got from drug squad on all of this, he thought he put it in the tray of his desk, now the whole file is missing "have you seen the folder on my desk/tray about Kerry and James". Not looking at Lawson now it all makes sense, why Kerry had come shaking his head hearing Lawson call out his name louder "Leon" hearing Kerry's voice in his head he was sure she meant it, she needed help, turning to look at Lawson "Kerry was here last night"

Looking at Leon did he hear him right "Kerry was here, did you try to stop her, why didn't' you call me" looking around the communications room could he say why "have you said no to Kerry or tried to stop her? … I tried Lawson I did"

Walking into the communications room hearing part of the conversation "he did try Lawson" looking at Stella shaking his head "No" seeing Stella look at Lawson "Kerry threatened him if he said anything" then with a cheeky grin "he was too busy staring at her anyway, she was hot" thumping the desk, damm Kerry what game did she think she was playing, now she knew everything not that he doubted he didn't before hand and they were back to square one "did you keep any of the copies on back up?" walking back to his computer "I can get your most of the information again"

…

Driving to Hastings, she knew Lawson would cover the other spots first, she knew they had a boat at Hastings marina thanks to last night she knew the name of the boat. Walking towards the boat she had hired, determination on her face. She would sit and watch for a day, she knew Col would come down here eventually and resting for a day she should be right.

Walking along the pier there should only be two of them now watching as Col comes out of the boat her gun aimed on him "get down on your knees" hearing a noise coming from the boat she glances seeing one if his minders, aim a gun at her "Put the gun down", facing the guy seeing him not putting the gun down she raises her gun, pulling the trigger, watching as he falls backwards in the water slight shock on her face part of her wanting to help her, shit what had she done, in all her years she had never shot a guy, she had done some things bordering on the rules but never this. Hearing Col's voice "you might want to put the gun down" her eyes fixed on him narrowing at him "I'm not putting the gun down, don't move" hearing her name called out "Kerry help me?" moving towards Col, her gun aimed on him as she turns around surprise on her face "Lisa?" wasn't she, she was James' girlfriend "Please Kerry do what they say" her eyes darting to Col then Lisa could she let them hurt Lisa, could she let Col go at the moment to save her son's girlfriend, her tongue moving around her mouth.

…..

Seeing the flashing on his screen Leon turns to Lawson "there has been shots fired at Hastings Marina" walking over to Leon "can you log into their cameras" looking at the computer Leon's eyes wide open, looking up at Lawson he goes back. Looking at the footage Lawson's eyes widen, Kerry standing there with a gun in her hand, pointing it at Col Williams closing his eyes opening them again it gets worse, he watches as a shot is fired and the body falls into the water, into the coms "Josh get to Hastings marina now, shots fired" before running out to TR1 where is the Kerry he knew, the Kerry that pushed the boundaries, and sometimes blurred them slightly but this was not her "get an ambulance on stand by, they are not to go into the marina until the police are there"

…..

Her eyes darting around could she let her need for revenge take control over helping someone, glancing at Lisa she puts her gun down "let her go" shaking his head "put the gun on the ground" lowering her gun to the ground, putting her hand in her pocket turning her mobile phone on. Looking up as the phone is on the ground she looks up at Lisa seeing a smirk on her face as she is released not going away but still standing next to the guy, all too late she realises she is set up looking at Lisa "you were in it all along?" looking at Kerry before turning to the guy a smirk on her face still "you do know she's a cop, she's James' mum" seeing them look at her, as she bends down to pick up her gun feeling a kick across her back knocking her down. Feeling something against her back she knows what it is without even seeing it as it is pushed harder against her "move now" glancing around, could she make a run for it jump over the wharf then what could she swim to safety where would she come up there was no- where to run to. As she is pushed onto the boat wincing as her ribs hits the seat, before being yanked up and pushed into the cabin. Seeing Lisa move into the cabin she looks up at her confusion in her eyes but the need to know "why Lisa? You used James?" her voice with anger in it "You got my son killed" looking at Kerry shrugging "You didn't know your son Kerry, it is a dog eat dog world it was me or him, I did what any person would do" then leaning closer to her "including you". Looking up at Lisa "you know you won't get away with it, as you said I'm a cop Lisa how long do you think you'll get for killing a cop" sitting down near Kerry she has to admit she admires her courage the lack of fear on her face, she was a cop "they will have to find a body Kerry, in this large spanse of water, really think they will" then leaning closer to her, her voice menancing "you haven't been at work for ages so they won't even come looking for you."

….

Travelling to Hastings, Lawson hears Leon's voice "Lawson, when you get to the marina there is two boats waiting for you, it is a blue boat left the marina about 2 minutes ago called "tripper" I'm tracking Kerry's mobile now, she's turned it on" then taking a deep breath "they have kidnapped Kerry, Lawson forced her into the boat". Arriving at the marina, the car not even come to a stop before Lawson is out, racing towards the boat. Powering across the water it isn't long before they see the boat racing towards it calling out to Christian "get us as close as you can"

Watching as two men come out on the desk firing at them "shots fired shots fired". Firing back at the boat, Lawson looks up as he sees Kerry being hauled out on the deck in front of them. Into his com "Cease fire" before giving instructions, turning to Christian "get us as close as you can". Hearing the double click of Josh's com, Lawson turns to Christian "go go go" as a bullet hits the engine before the next hits the back of the boat" Getting close to the boat he sees them diving into the water, pushing Kerry away onto the ground, pulling up beside the boat, leaping on board, racing over to Kerry, leaning down he looks seeing her eyes closed, feeling for a pulse, he looks at her, not finding any blood or gun shot wound, he quickly starts CPR. Looking at Lawson kneeling next to Kerry, no she can't be she can't even say it "Is she". Not really hearing Stella, every ounce of his concentration in giving Kerry CPR, he didn't think she hit her head that hard, he didn't even see a bullet wound on her.

Looking around the boat, Stella picks up the needle, tapping Lawson on the arm "Lawson, a needle" looking around the boat more she picks up a packet, looking up at Stella as she speaks "they injected her" nodding at Stella "Help me get her into the boat" then into his com "Christian we need the medi kit" seeing Stella look at him "its in the car Lawson"

Racing back to the marina Lawson and Stella not stopping performing CPR Stella can hear Lawson's voice worried and angry "breathe Kerry, come on, don't you dare die" talking more to himself "Fuck Kerry what do you think you were doing, you couldn't stop could you". Watching Lawson, Stella knew there was something between them once, but watching Lawson now, she wondered if those feelings were still there, continuing the compressions, relief on her face as she looks up seeing the marina getting closer "Leon is the ambulance at the marina?" hearing Leon's voice "it's about a minute away"

Arriving at the marina Lawson looks up seeing the ambulance officers running down "they gave her an overdose" watching as the ambulance officers work on her as they inject her with adrenalin Lawson's eyes not moving from her the relief evident on his face as he sees Kerry's eyes open.

Opening her eyes, trying to focus shit what happened to her, looking around she sees Lawson's eyes upon her with two others leaning down, sitting up pushing them aside "Get off me". Seeing Lawson kneel down next to her "Kerry, just sit there" looking at him, what was he doing here, seeing Stella and the others what were they all doing here. Looking around she sees Lisa sitting on a boat, a glare on her face cuffed, memories coming back to her, looking up at the officers "I'm fine" getting off the boat.

Walking back to the boat hopping inside she sees Lisa sitting there, hearing Lawson's voice "What are you doing Kerry" ignoring him walking over to Lisa "get up" seeing the confidence which was there earlier gone as Lisa's eyes are down, Kerry's eyes darting around the boat, seeing a bar there. Watching Josh and Stella hop on board the boat looking at her as they pull her up walking towards the exit, walking over to her touching Josh "wait a moment" before turning to Lisa "did you go out with James just to get him killed?" seeing Lisa not looking at her, she moves her hand up to her face, pushing it around to look at her, her voice loud "answer me, did you… talk to me you little shit or I will beat the crap out of you" seeing Lisa turn her eyes away from her, not answering her, she walks quickly over to the lever on the ground picking it up, smashing it into her legs as hard as she can watching as Lisa falls to the ground, turning to Josh "Get her up". Turning to look at Kerry, Josh lets go of Lisa "Kerry don't" grabbing the lever out of her hand just before she was about to smash it into Lisa again "you don't want to do that?" glaring at Josh she sees Lisa not getting up, walking over to her, lifting her left up, kicking her as hard as she can before turning to Stella "Get that piece of shit out of here".

Watching Kerry pick up something hitting Lisa, the shock on his face, he has never seen Kerry like this before, he had seen her lose it partly earlier when James went missing, but never like this she wasn't even thinking what she was doing. Looking up as Lawson walks towards her "Kerry you need to be check over by the ambulance, they're still waiting for you" looking up at Lawson his eyes so caring still towards her and filled with concern "I'm fine". Looking at Kerry Lawson still can't help but worry, he knows drug squad will be down here and soon and that they will arrest her, wanting to protect her but no idea how "your not fine, you had to be revived Kerry, they gave you an overdose, you were bloody lucky we got to you when we did" looking up at Lawson she knows she should be grateful but all she is feeling is the need to find Col and fast, looking up at Lawson "they were the lucky ones …. if it will shut you up I'll see the ambulance"

Watching as Kerry walks over, to the ambulance sitting in it, he turns to Stella "let me know the moment drug squad turns up"

Getting up off the stretcher pushing the ambulance officers away Kerry walks over to the TR car, seeing her gun their looking around picking it up and putting it in the back of her jeans feeling her pocket her car keys are still there. Racing to her car, putting the keys in the ignition, hearing it start she pulls away from the curb, tearing away from the marina.

Walking up to the ambulance Lawson hears a car starting, hoping it wasn't' what he thought he looks around as he hears one of them speak "we were just coming to get you, she got up and left" looking at the officers "what do you mean she left" hearing them say "she got in her car and left, pushed us away" shaking his head "shit" before racing to the TR car, seeing the gun missing punching the dashboard, then into his com "Stel, Christian, get to the car now, Kerry has left" seeing Stella and Christian running up to the TR car, Lawson curses as he sees a car pull up, watching as Detective Chris Finch and detective Gallaher get out "where is she Lawson" shrugging looking Chris in the eyes and able to tell Chris the truth "I don't know".

Looking at Lawson did he really expect him to believe that "what do you mean you don't know" looking at Chris his voice firm "I don't know where she is" shaking his head at Lawson, he should of known he would protect her "you let her go" looking directly at Chris his voice firm "she left Chris, she got treated and left". Taking a deep breath trying to control himself "if I find out you let her go Lawson, I'll charge you … I thought she was seriously injured" looking up at Chris not giving anything away if he had his way Kerry would still be here "they overdosed her Chris, she is lucky to be alive, she got revived and given adrenalin … I DON'T KNOW where she is now" looking at Lawson wondering whether to believe him or not he knows how stubborn Kerry is "the guy she shot did he die?" walking away from Chris "don't know and don't really care…" interrupting Lawson "You should care, if Kerry has killed the guy it is murder" turning to look at Chris controlling the anger in his voice "The prick went for Kerry it was self defence, stop trying to pin everything on her, and find out what really happened"


	9. Chapter 9

_**Sorry its been a while writing this one, hopefully just a chapter or two to go and should finish it soon, hope you enjoy it still**_

_**This is taken from one of the most powerful scenes from Rush**_

Pulling up at the QT bar, not even closing the door, she knows most of it by now, and no doubt Col thinks she is dead at the bottom of the ocean. Making sure her gun is tucked into her pants on her back before heading towards the bar.

Driving away from the marina Lawson hears Leon's voice "Lawson the list is on the screen now" looking at the screen "Leon are you able to log into any of them?" then looking at Stella "go to the QT bar, Josh where are you?"

Seeing Col walk out of the club Kerry walks behind him at a close distance "turn around slowly" seeing him ignore him, pulling her gun out she aims it on him, firing close to him seeing him stop on the spot her gun aimed on him "give me one good reason why I shouldn't blow your brains out now" seeing him look at her fear in his eyes not seeing it focused on one thing, now she has the guy who organised to get her son killed all the hatred boiling over "get down on your knees" seeing him ignore him walking over closer to him, hitting him across the face with her gun. Seeing him on his knees the gun aimed on him trying to remain strong not wanting to think about any consequences just one thing on her mind, ignoring the voices in her head James voice "you're a good cop mum I knew you would get him, don't do this Mum".

Logging on the cameras at the QT bar, accessing the outside his eyes wide open talking to himself first "shit" before into his com "Lawson you need to get to the QT club now" hearing Leon's voice does he really want to know seeing Stella look at him quickly whilst driving "send through what you have Leon" opening up the screen his eyes drawn to it, seeing the gun inches away from his head, Kerry's eyes focused on one thing, looking around, they are still at least 10 minutes away hoping Stella can drive faster he needs to get there ASAP before Kerry did something stupid or worse kill the guy, hearing Stella's voice as if she read her mind "I can't go much fast in this traffic" hearing Leon's voice again "turn off at Brighton, the lights will all be green, you shouldn't get stuck in the traffic" all Lawson can do is nod, who knows what Kerry can do in the time it will take them to get there, and if anyone else gets there quicker "Leon, keep all the GD's away, everyone a silent approach". Looking at Lawson Stella wishes she could drive faster, she had never seen Kerry like this she was always so in control, yeah she bent the rules to suit her slightly, she was tough though glancing at Lawson "you don't think the GD's or anyone would do anything or…" she couldn't say it she didn't even want to think it.

Glancing around not even aware of a small crowd drawing near only focused on one thing and nothing else, turning back to Col she sees him getting up, her face hardened, not even thinking aiming her gun at his leg as she pulls the trigger she watches as he falls to the ground. Walking over to him, grabbing him by the shirt as she pulls him to his knees "get up now", walking slightly before moving in front of him, her gun only inches from his head, can she do it can she really pull the trigger her mind not thinking clearly, she wanted revenge she wanted payback she wanted to kill the guy who got James killed why should he live if James was dead. Pushing him back down on the ground her eyes focused on his, coldness in them her gun only inches from his head.

Arriving at the club hearing the gun shots Lawson sees Stella and Christian looking at him, not even closing the door sprinting down the ramps, stopping as she sees Kerry in front of him with the gun trained on Col's head into his com "Christian if the D's or drug squad come keep them up there" seeing Josh arrive in TR2 turning to him quickly "cordon off the area, Keep everyone up here, the last thing Kerry needs is to see everyone here"

Turning back to Kerry, hoping he can get through to her would she even listen to him, she has now found those responsible for not only killing James but nearly killing Kerry to is he able to get through to her "Kerry" seeing her not even look at him "Kerry … talk to me?"

Looking up hearing a voice "shit, what is Lawson doing here, of all people Lawson, not even looking at him, why did he think she would want to talk to him, she doesn't want to talk to anyone "No Lawson just leave" then glancing up seeing Stella and Josh there, what are they all doing there, do you really want them to see you like this "it's better if you all leave"' wanting to get closer to her but keeping his distance "No, I'm not going to do that Kerry I'm not leaving you don't need to do this" her eyes trained on him, what doesn't he get you never really thought it would end up like this but now it has, you don't want the team to see you like this, but now you don't care about anyone else but what he deserves "don't I … yes I do" not even looking at Lawson wishing he would leave, wishing they would all leave so it was just the two of them, she never thought it would really to come to this, she didn't even think at all, all she wanted is revenge.

Having negotiated so many times before and usually with success he had never been in a situation like this, having to talk his boss down, having the whole team see her like this "Kerry just tell me what's going on you don't want to do this" he is sure of that despite what she had said to him. Wishing Lawson would just shut up and leave did you really think he wouldn't find her, would let her do what she wanted, did he think she would talk to him "yeah I think I do" seeing Kerry ignoring him, he has to get through to her, he can't let her to this, throw her life away, his voice louder "Kerry put the gun down NOW" not even looking at Lawson there is no way she is putting the gun down the scumbag is going to pay for what he had done not even looking at Lawson she knows what she has to do, wishing Lawson would just go away "I have to do this, he deserves this, this bastard took my son away from me" .

Shaking her head trying to focus back on Col her vision starting to blur slightly, looking back up at Col glancing briefly around, seeing Lawson there walking closer to her, hearing his voice "You don't want to throw your life away, you can't have it both ways, you shoot him now Kerry there is no turning back" glancing at Lawson he did have a point you are a good cop and this will ruin my job if it hasn't already, shaking her head, no you will be able to get out of it. Hearing James voice "You're a shit mum but a good cop" taking a deep breath, it will be worth it to get James killer, to get revenge, she will always be a good cop. Looking up briefly at Lawson she sees the worry in his eyes glancing around seeing Stella/Josh even Shannon and Christian are near by, shit why are they all here, seeing you like this, do you actually care though. You don't want to throw your life away, you don't want your team to see you like this, but it is what has to happen, hearing Lawson's voice again, why cant he just shut up, he can be so annoying "Kerry just make the arrest, you don't want to kill him, think about what you're doing….. if you shoot him, he could get off, get away with killing James" her eyes still trained on Col, trying to ignore what Lawson is saying did he have a point shaking her head no it will be worth it, why should he live or get away with it "not if I kill him, he doesn't deserve to live, he KILLED James, don't you get that Lawson" watching Lawson walking closer towards her, turning to face him "don't move any closer" stopping and looking at Kerry he knew her, despite it all when it was all over she would regret it "Kerry look at me…. You don't want to kill him" hearing her interrupting him, was he serious of course she did didn't she "yes I do" trying to get Kerry to watch him, he thought he would be able to reason with her, that she would listen to him, he has to get through to her, he can't let her throw her life awy "No you don't think about what your doing Kerry, if you kill him YOU WILL go to jail, you're a cop and a good one, He is not worth it, is he worth throwing your life away, he isn't just PUT the gun down Kerry, arrest him" trying to remain in control, why can't Lawson just walk away despite it all, she knows the consequences of her shooting him, everything that has happened did she still have a job, feeling herself starting to fall apart why did she have to feel like this, she walks slightly away from Col before walking over to him bringing up her leg kicking him across the face watching him fall to the ground. Seeing Josh and Lawson walk closer, trying to remain strong, moving away from him, her legs collapsing from underneath her, she falls to the ground her hands on the ground before lifting up, the tears falling down her face the guy who killed her son in front of her.

Watching her boss fall to the ground, Stella never thought she would see the day Kerry would fall apart, be out of control, she was also so in control tough not letting things get to here she was in front of her now, walking quickly over to Col putting the cuffs on him, pulling him to the ground, moving him away from Kerry, her eyes wide she felt sorry for her, not imagining what she was going through, she doubts she would ever forget today dam, wiping her eyes walking away she doesn't/can't stare or look at Kerry looking up seeing Shannon walking towards her seeing the shock on her face too nothing said between them.

Glancing at Stella as she hurries over to Col to make the arrest, Lawson picks up Kerry's gun before kneeling down next to her pulling her towards him wrapping his arm around her as sobs fill her body

Watching it all on screen the fact his boss the person so in control, the one who was hard and tough, so out of control not able to help it as a tear falls down his face, wiping it away he watches Lawson put his arm around her.

Feeling Lawson's arms grasp her as the walk crumbles and the tears fall, you don't want too, you want to remain strong, the grief coming to the surface, everything starting to come.

.Feeling Lawson's arms around her, the enormity of what she had or would of done suddenly hitting her, pulling away from Lawson, she doesn't' want his comfort she doesn't want to feel anything, looking up seeing the concerned and worried looks on her teams face, she doesn't want anyone seeing her like this, she is tough and always in control, not able to face them she gets up the need to get away strong, running towards her car, hearing footsteps behind her, shaking her head trying to see where she is going, looking up seeing a face not able to recognise something feels wrong, why can't she run, shaking her head, the dizziness comes, it she feels her legs going from beneath her as she collapses to the ground.

Running over to Kerry looking at her, Lawson into his com "Leon I need an ambulance now"

….

Walking into the hospital the past few weeks catching up with Lawson, the toll of it all physically and emotionally, wanting to protect Kerry from herself but failing seeing her collapsing at the bar and falling to the ground in a heap, falling apart in front of everyone, her hardness had gone for a short period until she quickly regained her composure again.

Walking inside her room seeing police officers outside her room, he never thought the day would come where Inspector Kerry Vincent would be under guard, she broke the rules and flaunted them but this was something totally different. Seeing a nurse walking out of her room "How is she going?" looking at Kerry lying there "Physically she is on the way to recovery the operation went well, and the swelling has started to go down, she has broken ribs and there is swelling, but emotionally I don't think she is going to well, she is a tough person but underneath it all she needs help" smiling at the nurse before walking inside she was a tough person, a hard nut, trying to do everything herself, not seeking help when James died but going after revenge instead. Sitting down next to Kerry holding her hand, watching as her chest goes up and down, tubes still attached to her, her face still bruised wanting to put his arms around her and protect her and comfort her "why didn't you listen to me Kerry, stop being so stubborn, you were so intent on revenge, now look at you know, police guard outside your room too, I don't know how to help you anymore"

Hearing a voice, Lawson looks up seeing Detective Finch standing at the door of the room looking inside "How is she going?" a glare on his face, even though he knows it isn't his fault the need to blame someone other than Kerry there "how do you think Chris, you were so determined to get Kerry did you ever think what she was going through and try to help her?" Walking inside the room he didn't want it to come to this, despite it all, he liked Kerry admired her, ever since he first met her, there was something about her but he had a job to do one he didn't want to do at the moment "I had a job to do Lawson, Kerry crossed a line, and she needs to pay the consequences of her actions" looking at Kerry before looking up at Chris "she lost her son Chris, those bastards killed her son" looking at Kerry lying there before looking back at Lawson "I'm aware of that Lawson, do you think I like doing this, do you think I want to do this to her Lawson" looking up at Chris at the moment he wasn't sure of anything "what's going to happen to her?" looking at Kerry then back at Lawson "not sure yet, but she has a lot to answer for, they are preparing a brief for her now, it doesn't look good Lawson"


	10. Chapter 10

Walking into hospital room, seeing Kerry sitting up, an officer nearby Lawson looks at her, her face hard showing no emotion, sitting next to her "what have you done Kerry?" her eyes darting around the room not looking at him her mouth slightly open "I never thought it would come to this" shaking his head at Kerry trying to get her to look at him "that's your problem, you never did think or take responsibility". Her eyes focused on the officer in her room not able to look at Lawson "I didn't think" interrupting her "that's your problem you don't think of the consequences" glaring at him finishing her sentence "I didn't think I'd get caught"

Looking at the officer "give us some time alone" seeing the officer hesitate before walking out, Lawson moves his chair closer to her "got what you want now Kerry, get those responsible?" looking down and around before looking back at Lawson "Any mother would do the same Lawson" looking at Kerry is she serious she has no idea what she has done "Not any mother I doubt any mother would" seeing Kerry look up at him, her face still devoid of emotion "do you have kids?" not waiting for Lawson to answer knowing the answer her voice loud "No … so when you do, come back and tell me what I should do how I should act, I lost my son Lawson, and you have no idea how that feels"

…

Walking inside the headquarters, Lawson looks around, hurrying up the stairs, he sees Chris coming out of a door "can I see her" the sentence coming out more as an order than asking. Looking at Lawson he hopes maybe he can talk some sense into her nodding "see if you can talk to her, she's giving us nothing" looking at Chris he looks exhausted "she's been through a lot having lost James". Walking away "I know Lawson, but it still doesn't excuse what she did"

Seeing the door open, Kerry looks up rolling her eyes, shit could it get any worse, why did Lawson have to come, she can't say she is surprised he had always been protective of her, he was still the last person she wanted to see though. Turning her head away from him, this was her mess she was in, she didn't need his or anyone's help.

Walking inside he should of known that he wouldn't get a welcome from her, seeing her turn her head away from him he still walks turning the officer in the room "give us ten" seeing him still looking at him, flashing his badge "I'll be just outside" sitting down opposite Kerry looking at her, she is looking slightly older the toll of the past few weeks catching up on her.

He wanted to help her but now had no idea how he had tried and she had kept pushing him away and not wanting his help, he wanted to reach out to her, show her that he was here for her no matter what that he would help her get through it all. Seeing her sitting here he had no idea now how, she was in serious deep shit, with manslaughter charges along with other changes hanging over her head, he really doubted that she would walk away from it all.

Turning around to face Lawson seeing him still there, her eyes still cold and no feeling showing she can't show emotion, or the fact that she actually likes having Lawson there the need to push him away and do this on her own "what are you doing here Lawson, I DON'T WANT YOUR HELP, just go and leave me alone"

Reaching out and touching her arm, feeling her pull away like she had been bitten by some dangerous creature "I'm not going anywhere Kerry, you need to fight this, you can't give up now"

Looking up at Lawson seeing the caring face the concern in his eyes, despite trying to push him away deep down she knows she can't and that he would always be there for her no matter what, looking up at him but there was one fact that will always remain "Lawson I killed someone, how do you get over that" leaning forward hoping he is starting to get through to her "it was self defence Kerry, you've been through a lot the past few weeks, you need to fight these charges"

Seeing Chris walk into the room "Kerry, the body in the drug lab, the explosion" Not looking at Lawson or Chris but more to herself her voice soft "I wanted to burn the place down, I'll never forget the look on those faces or the look on James face", looking at her wondering what she meant "James's face" nodding "I saw the CCTV footage, and it showed a scared frightened boy, I just had to make them pay" looking at Kerry part of him understand in a way what she was aiming to do "so you burnt the place down", shaking her head "I wanted to, but I didn't …. There was an explosion I was lucky to just get out … they were making some drug" then looking up at Lawson "so what happens now?"

Watching as Chris walks in the room turning to Lawson "Kerry at the moment you are free to go, but don't leave Melbourne, this is just the beginning". Looking up at Chris in surprise, he thought Kerry would be staying here "she's free to go" shaking his head "she is able to go, there will be charges, but at the moment they are making a brief and gathering evidence, when they have enough, I have no doubt that Kerry will be charged until that she is able to go back to work"

Her tongue moving around her mouth, was Chris serious, she knew it wasn't the end of it, she didn't know what was worse, waiting to see what happened or being charged now, getting up off the seat her shoes clicking against the floor turning to the door looking at Chris, her eyes wide before turning away following Lawson out.

…..

Walking into the base two days later, how long had it been since she had been there, she never thought she would be able to go back there, now she has no idea for how long. She doubts it will take them long to gather the evidence they needed looking at Leon seeing him turn to face her a smile on her face "Welcome back Kerry" nodding at the intel officer not able to say anything, despite it all she should be happy, looking at the pile of paper on her desk how did her life get in such a mess, her son dead facing good ness knows what charges flinging the paper onto the floor.

Hearing a noise Leon runs to the cubicle, seeing papers everywhere looking at Kerry "You ok" before walking over and helping her "I'm fine Leon, just go back to the computer" walking out standing at the door, watching his boss, he had always seen her strong and in control of herself, she yelled at him and others but he had never seen her like this.

….

Walking out to her car a few days later, looking up at Lawson arrives back seeing him walk over to her "you ok" glaring at Lawson "if one more person asks if I'm ok, how I'm going… I'm FINE" giving a short smile despite her words he wondered if he was "I'm here if you need me" looking at Lawson she knew that, he was always there for her, despite what he thought was right sometimes and saw things differently her voice soft "I know"

About to hop in the car, seeing two cars drive in, seeing Chris and the other detective get out along with 3 others, seeing them walk over to her "Inspector Kerry Vincent" her eyes looking at them, seeing Lawson move closer to her "Yeah, who are you" seeing them pull out their badge "Inspector Cox from Ethical Standards, Detective Hodges and Detective Mills from homicide" her eyes darting around as they walk closer to her "Kerry Vincent, you are under arrest, you are being charged with killing Raynor Milner, kidnapping, leaving the scene of a crime to name a few ", looking at Kerry trying to hide his shock, he hoped she wouldn't but the evidence was too much, looking at her, he sees her looking up at him, trying to hide the shock, seeing them walk over to her as the handcuffs are put on her as they continue "You are now officially suspended from duty from Tactical Response until further notice" closing her eyes, she knows she is in deep shit she never thought this would happen, she had gotten away with so much before. Lawson watches helplessly as she is lead towards one of the cars wanting to help her "I'll get you a lawyer Kerry" seeing the Chris look at him "make sure it's a bloody good one, she has one charge of manslaughter, and many other charges against her"

Looking at Kerry as she stops at the door of the car looking at him, her face back to showing no emotion, shit he knew it wasn't going to be good but he didn't think it would come to this not one to yell or get angry at others he can't help it turning to the homicide "You can't do this" seeing them look at him "just watch us" before turning to Chris the need to help Kerry strong "Chris that is bullshit, it was self defence, the guy was going to shoot Kerry". Hating what he is doing to Kerry and Lawson "Homicide is talking about the body in the drug lab" watching helplessly as he sees the door of the car closes. Looking up he sees the surprise on the faces of the team, for a moment forgetting the others were still here.

Watching from the corridor in surprise, Leon walks further out, his mouth open as he watches Kerry handcuffed and arrested before being escorted to the car, looking across he sees he isn't the only one watching the shock on all their faces as they watch the cars drive away.

…..

Pacing the corridor at headquarter, unable to go home, driving around for ages, before stopping here his phone ringing and beeping, he doesn't even need to look he knows it would be Shannon wondering where he is and how he is going ignoring her calls, the need to see Kerry to see how she is going.

Seeing Chris walk out of the room "I need to see Kerry?" seeing Chris look at him tiredness on his face "She doesn't want to see you Lawson" walking forward looking straight at him "I don't care, Chris, I need to see Kerry" seeing his mouth move around "See if you are able to get her to talk, say something, anything that will help her, she's giving us nothing Lawson. I want to be able to help her" glancing at Chris raising his eyes he had a funny way of showing it.

Leaning back in the chair her arms folded across her chest, rolling her eyes, shit why did Chris have to let him in seeing Chris at the door "what part of I don't want to see anyone especially Lawson didn't you get Chris"

Seeing Chris glance at him a knowing look on his face before walking out as Lawson walks over to her sitting down opposite her, seeing her eyes moving around the room avoiding his "Talk to me Kerry ….. I'm trying here to help you Kerry, but you need to work with me here".

"I don't need you help Lawson"

Raising his eyes at Kerry shit, why did she have to be so tough and stubborn "your angry I get that" rolling her eyes at him "Geez thanks" as he continues "you can't do this Kerry, you need to fight these charges, I know you, you didn't kill anyone, please"

Shrugging at Lawson "Maybe you don't know me as well as you think" shaking his head sadly at her "your wrong there, I know you better than you think Kerry, once this is all over you will wish you had fought harder. I don't know what you're going through, but you need to fight this, these people killed James, if you go to jail Kerry or are found guilty they could get away with it … where's the justice in that"

Looking at Lawson her face showing no emotion "No one said Life's fair" not willing to give up on her "why did you become a cop Kerry, to help fight justice"

Hearing the door open, looking at Lawson and Chris coming in her mouth slightly open her tongue moving around inside, despite it all she probably would do it all again the fact still remained she did kill someone, whether it was self defence or not she didn't go and help him or give him any first aide now with the charges formal she needs to do this by herself "I don't need your help or Lawson's" then turning to Lawson "Just piss off, I don't want you visiting me, coming here or trying to help me" glancing at Kerry the tough boss coming back, her vulnerability gone Kerry his voice soft "I'm not giving up on you and I'm not going to stop trying to help you" walking to the door turning around wanting Kerry to help herself not to give up, seeing Chris look at her "maybe a night in the holding cell will change her mind".

Looking up at Chris her eyes hard as she gets up "don't you start" putting his hands up "if you don't want to fight them and spend the next few years or more in jail, being a cop too will be hard, then I'm not going to stop you" glaring at him "Reverse psychology Chris" shaking her head "Isn't going to work" before working out heading to the cells.

Walking down to the holding cells stopping briefly her eyes fixed straight ahead not one to show fear, not for the first time wondering why it had turned to shit, why she hadn't been able to get out of it.


End file.
